Sunday, October 08, 2006


My mum has really pissed me off today. My Mum has always criticised everything I do. She can't come round here or have the kids with her without moaning and griping about something. It's always something petty, like there being mud from the boys shoes on my hallway carpet, or me not having any bananas in the fridge, or I've packed the wrong colour socks in Bel's bag. Seriously, it's always something ridiculous. I never stuck up for myself when she was like this, and she always made me feel so useless. The truth is she was an awful parent, and as such has no right to criticise. I always felt unloved and a burden, and was told it regularly. About 2 years ago she stopped doing it and we've got on fine ever since.
These last two weeks she's started it again. On the phone, round here for dinner, there is always something I'm doing wrong. I'm not putting up with it this time. I'm 26, not 12!
She has had the kids this weekend while we've been doing this shop stuff, so that's great and we appreciate it. She called me when we'd already left moaning that the raincoat I'd packed Isobel wasn't warm enough(she also had long sleeve t-shirts on). Then when I pick them up today she starts ranting that the shoes Isobel has on are too big. They're Kickers and are a 10, Isobel is a 9. Kickers are supposed to come up big. Then when I say she hasn't got new winter boots yet(these are from a friend who's daughter has outgrown them), she says I should've packed her sandals. What the fuck?!? One minute it's too cold for a raincoat, the next minute she wants sandals. Unbelievable.
I just snapped, and asked her if all the bullying and bitching was going to start again. I told her she has no right to question my parenting as hers left so much to be desired. She moaned that my priorities are wrong, to which I replied that yes, we are poor and people have to go without, but my childhood was no better. I'm not the one who spent all my money on cigarettes and bingo while her daughter went without. I go without all the time, my work shoes had to be super glued back together for a year as I couldn't buy new ones, and my hair wasn't trimmed for 2 years. You can't get much closer to the bottom of the pile than me.
I'm really angry as she started all this in front of the kids, and we never row in front of them at home.
I said that if she's upset about Nan dying that's fine, but don't take it out on me, because I won't put up with it this time. She'll have no one if she doesn't watch herself. I won't be speaking to her, I don't expect an apology as such, but if she wants to see the kids she'd better phone me and she'd better be in a good mood.


Lara said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lara said...

Pfft! Mothers FFS. Mine's just the same, ~I can't be arsed with it all but then she keeps *just about* on the good side of it cos she knows she has more to lose now we have Jake. She'll sort her head out, they always do; sometimes it takes an ultimatum - like the one I gave my mum when I was pregnant and she
actually started making an effort. If she can do it then believe me, anyone (except my father) can.